Psycho Dad, Part II

Posted: May 24, 2012 in domestic abuse, relationship, storytelling

(If you haven’t read Part I, then this story will probably not make any sense to you.  So, do yourself a favor and check it out before this one.)

Two years have passed since Part I occurred. I’ve pretty much lost contact with Mia, but Rachel and I have kept in touch every now and then. I’m sitting at home when the phone rings. “Hello,” I answered.

“Hey, Quincy, this is Mia!”

“Wow. Hey, Mia, how have you been?”

“I’ve been great! Just staying busy in grad school. Speaking of which, I hate to call you out of the blue, but I need something.”

“What’s up?”

“I’m working on a paper and I need your help.” 

Mia used me as a study partner back in the day. Whenever she had a paper to write, I was her critic. I figured it was no big deal to help her out again. However, in the back on my mind, I’m wondering if she’s just trying to get back in my good graces after the incident. Is she just trying to lure me back into her life? I continue to ponder this as I get directions to her apartment, hang up the phone and start to get dressed. I give her friend, Rachel, a call just to see if I can pry her for info, but her phone goes to voicemail. I leave her a message that I’m going to Mia’s place to help her with homework and hang up. I guess I’m going to give Mia the benefit of the doubt and see if she just wants to explain what happened that night.

I arrive to her complex about 20 minutes later. It’s a nice apartment complex and within seconds of getting out of my car, I’m on the 2nd floor and knocking on her door. She answers the door wearing a long t-shirt and I’m unsure at first glance if she has anything underneath them or not. I give her a hug and close the door behind me. Mia walks to the couch and sits with her legs crossed. As her shirt rises up from the way she’s sitting, I breathe a sigh of relief as I see that she’s wearing short pants underneath. Mia is an attractive girl and I have nothing against making a move on her. However, ever since “the incident,” I just don’t know how I feel around her. I still feel some pity for her although I’m proud of the fact that she’s moved on. She’s working on her Masters degree and has a really nice apartment. Then a series of events commenced that changed that very thought within seconds of conceiving it:

 (baby cries)

“You have a kid?” I asked.

“It has been a while since I’ve spoken to you, hasn’t it?” she replied. “Don’t worry. His dad will take care of him.”

“Mia?” called a man’s voice.

My heart dropped as I stood up from the couch. She invited me over to her place and some dude lives there, too? Out of the room he comes and sure enough, it’s him. The guy who abused Mia in front of my home just two years prior. He seemed just as shocked to see me as I was to see him. Immediately, I felt uneasy because we both have surprised looks on our faces to see each other again. Mia breaks the tension and speaks up, “Gene, this is Quincy. Quincy, Gene.”

(baby cries)

There’s about six feet of space separating us, but I choose not to walk over and shake hands. I simply give a head nod and say, “what’s up?”

“Not much man,” he answered.  “Mia didn’t tell me that you were her tutor. I’m not sure how I feel about that.”

“Well, she didn’t tell me she had a baby by her brother either,” I sarcastically replied.

He looked confused for a second and then smiled as an indication that he recognized what I was reminiscing over. “Aw, man, that was like five years ago or something,” he started. “We worked through all of that. I overreacted a bit.”

“No, it was just a couple of years… ‘a bit?'” I said stopping in the middle of my sentence after realizing the absurdity of what he just spewed. “Mia, I’m going to go.”

I realize that I’m going to have to get past Gene in order to reach the door. I don’t want to agitate him in his own place, but I’m actually the angry one at this point. Not necessarily at him, but at Mia. She married her abuser, had a kid by him (hence the nickname we later gave him as “Psycho Dad”) and then invited me over into the same apartment with him? How stupid is that? She had no idea how either one of us would react to seeing each other again. Gene smiled and said, “Dude, you don’t have to leave because of me. I ain’t going to swing on you or nothing.  You can help her with her paper.”

 (baby is still crying) 

At this point, I’ve sized him up. He weighed about an extra 15-20 lbs. since I saw him last, but he was still a lightweight in my eyes. I walked past him and placed my hand on the door knob, but as I cracked the door, I stopped and turned around. “Gene, man,” I started, “I’m not worried about you swinging on me because unlike Mia, I’ll swing back. Take care of your crying baby.”

The words trailed off of my lips as I closed the door behind. I didn’t even stay long enough to see either of their reactions to what I said.  I have a lump in my throat as I hurry to my car not knowing if this nut is coming outside behind me or not. Could I take him? Yes, I honestly think I could have whipped the sleeves off of him. However, I’m not a fighter. It’s not anything that I want to do without a legitimate reason. Fights lead to grudges and grudges lead to revenge. I didn’t have time to look over my shoulder for the rest of my life. Jackson is way too small of a city to have someone looking for you. However, if he came out of that door and attempted to try me, I was more than ready to jack him up to the highest level of “jackstivity.”

As I get to my car, I see Rachel getting out of hers. “I got your voicemail. Is everything okay?,” she asked. 

“How come you didn’t tell me that fool married that fool?”

“Because she told me not to tell you. She was ashamed. I’m surprised she called you over here with him here without telling you first. She says that he hasn’t hit her since that night, but I know he still yells a lot.”

“And you believe that he hasn’t?”

“No, I don’t, but she’s my friend, what am I supposed to say? You’re lying?”

“Yes, that is exactly what you’re supposed to say.  Call me later.”

I get into my ’91 Geo Prizm and drive out of the complex. My phone starts ringing as I get on the road, but I just let it ring since I know that it’s Mia. I never saw her again after that evening. Her and Gene now have two kids and have been married 10+ years.  I ran into Rachel a couple of years ago and from what she told me, Gene is actually a good husband and father now. Not necessarily of his own doing, but nonetheless, that’s the case. He was “influenced” to be a better man after an incident at their apartment complex.

A guy accidentally bumped Gene’s car with his car in the complex parking lot.  Instead of acting like an adult, Gene flew off the handle on the dude. He got in the man’s face and in the process of screaming and cursing, he accidentally spit on the man. The man then threw a right cross that caught Gene just outside of his left eye. The impact of the punch broke Gene’s glasses and placed a nice-sized gash right above his left eyebrow. I’m told he still has a scar above that eye to this day.  From what Rachel told me, there were two hits in the fight: the guy hit Gene and Gene hit the ground.

That altercation led to the cops being called and Gene ultimately being ordered to attend anger management classes. Rachel said that those classes really turned him around (or that punch did).  I guess if he had to do it all over again, he never would have gotten in that particular man’s face. People with “Semper Fi” bumper stickers on their car tend not to play around when they’re threatened.

I only wish he’d been at my crib the night that first incident went down.

Do people deserve a second chance when it comes to domestic abuse?

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Comments
  1. You were right. I don't like this one any more than I did the first one! Especially because the dumb bitch married the fool and brought a kid into an abusive situation. An innocent child into that kind of anger. I am going to hold out on leaving any further comment, now or ever, because there is NO way I can stay calm enough to write something that isn't a string of curses. The answer to your question is NO. Any man…ANYONE puts their hands on me and they NEVER get another chance. Not just because I don't give them but because I will break every single fucking bone in their hand…they'll not be able to use it again in anger or any other way. Know how hard it is to jerk off with a claw, asshole!?

  2. Thank, Q says:

    Inhale… exhale… inhale… exhale… Better? :)I couldn't believe that she actually stayed with and married the guy. Maybe it was a self-esteem thing because she was "pleasantly plump." At least that's what her friend, Rachel, told me that's what she thought. I'm not sure why she didn't think any more of herself to dump him. Even though he's supposed to be better now, giving him a second chance just wasn't a smart move to me.

  3. There are men out there that love "plump" women…I should know…they're going to be paying my bills once M legalizes prostitution (maybe not but you know what I mean). I am a bigger woman and I would rather hump the corner of a sofa for the rest of my life then be with somebody who hit me. Just saying.

  4. Thank, Q says:

    Ouch! The corner? Surely you have more hump-friendly furniture. I'll let M&M know that you're down with his master plan! :)People are just people. Despite our many shapes and sizes, there's always someone out there for everyone.

  5. Lawfrog says:

    I am glad you posted the second part of this story. I was fairly certain it would end with Mia marrying Abuser.com and having little Therapyforlifeinthemaking spawn with him. It's sad, but it seems to end that way so often. I managed a domestic violence shelter once and having practiced family law, I've seen my share of it. A woman goes back an average of 7 times before leaving an abuser for good. I do hope Gene has become a better man and that he and Mia have a good life together. I will always hope that for anyone, but I am constantly suspect of anyone who has previously been an abuser. When I think about how difficult it is to make changes in my own life, even simple ones like working out more, eating better, etc., I realize how difficult it is for others to change their patterns as well. I recently read an article regarding domestic abuse that I'd like to share here. Forward it on to Rachel if you still know her, she could use it for the next friend she knows who's in trouble with some idiot: http://www.feministe.us/blog/archives/2011/08/08/i-can-handle-it-on-relationship-violence-independence-and-capability/

  6. Thank, Q says:

    Thanks for the link! I will check it out myself and send it on. 7x before leaving baffles me, but I know that it happens. I just don't understand it. I would be concerned that if I had kids, that they would be next on the "hit list." All I can do is wish her the best and hope the kid never has to experience anything being done to his mom.

  7. Marrie says:

    I do believe that people possess the ability to change; however, I would never test the theory on me or my children! First time shame on you, second time shame on me and that's a chance not worth taking…EVER! To be honest, I don't get it either. If you don't have the balls or self esteem to leave for your safety, at least step up for your children!

  8. Thank, Q says:

    Amen, Marrie! That's a great way of looking at it! Why be the test subject for a man has claimed to change? Let someone else figure out if he has or not. Definitely don't subject a child to it. Thanks for commenting!

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