MILF & Cookies

Posted: October 25, 2011 in relationship, sex, women

Ladies, do you hate it when guys label you? Have you ever been categorized simply by being an older woman who happens to be single? Cougars aren’t widely popular. Some people women frown upon an older woman pursuing a younger guy. They look at these women like predators (hence the term “cougar). But, they’re not. These women are just ladies who know what they want and have the means to go get it.

What’s wrong with that?

Now, to guys, cougars are the best thing since the invention of the NFL Sunday Ticket. A sexy, older woman that is willing-and-able to make “the game” easy for you is a young man’s dream come true. A lot of cougars don’t waste time. They call you up, you come over, they open the door and the conversation goes pretty much like this: “Come in, shut up, lay down, get out.”

You get yours and she gets hers and everyone is happy. Now, some guys are put off by them because they don’t like the woman as the “shot caller” (aggressor). They don’t like her being in control or deciding the terms of the relationship.

I never experienced a cougar, but I dated an older woman once. I was 24 and she was 38. However, she wasn’t that aggressive. In fact, she was more of a house cat than a cougar. She was what a lot of guys refer to as a MILF. She was divorced with a 14 year old son and we were more of a “friends with benefits” type of couple than anything. She didn’t call the shots or try to dominate the situation.

There’s a difference between a MILF and a Cougar: a MILF may not have any interest in younger men, but younger men seek them out. A Cougar seeks out younger men because “Stella is trying to get her groove back.” Being called a MILF is actually a compliment to a few, but an insult to most. The same goes with cougars. Calling some women a cougar can get you “paw slapped” while a select few may give you a smile.

Quite a few younger guys prefer MILFs. Although any woman your age can technically be a MILF, the term normally applies to an older, attractive woman with children.

A woman like that may not necessarily be attracted to younger guys, but some times when a guy shows her interest, the need to feel appreciated can actually transform her into a cougar. But, if that doesn’t happen, then the guy may need to get into a relationship with her in order to “get the cookies.” And I know some guys who don’t mind a little MILF and cookies because there are advantages of having an older woman as a significant other. Older women generally don’t play games and are pretty stable in their lives.  But, I also know some guys who run from the “Just Add Man” instant family.

Some guys are concerned of being involved with a MILF because her kids are part of the package and deserve some attention as well. Knuckleheads these days have problems taking care of their own kids yet alone someone else’s.

With a cougar, yeah, she may have kids, but you probably wouldn’t even know it because her only goal is for you to come over, “put in your 20 minutes” and get out. But, the benefit of a MILF is that you’re more than likely the only guy she’s sleeping with at the time. A cougar may have quite a few young bucks in her stable. Decisions, decisons, huh, guys?

But, seriously… Memo to the guys: if you like a woman for a relationship or just for sex, then try not to label her or allow your friends to do so. These things are degrading to women and we do enough of that, okay? Just be happy that someone has some interest in your immature self.

And for the ladies, don’t be put off by the labels. We guys will always be juvenile in nature and come up with some term to try and categorize women. It’s what we do. We can’t help it although we should try harder not to do it. Unfortunately, our brains don’t fully develop until we’re Yoda’s age. So, regardless if you’re labeled as either a MILF or a cougar by some idiot, then don’t let guys dictate how you feel about dating younger.

Hugh Hefner has ejaculated dust for decades now and no one ever says anything to him.

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Comments
  1. …it's because the dust Hef is ejaculating is GOLD dust…

    Women do it too. A male-equivalent to a cougar is a Silver Fox. I should know, because I'm hoping to be one when I'm older.

    Ambitions, baby…

  2. Thank, Q says:

    @ LiI – Yeah, Hef does ooze money. I guess that's a sex pheromone within itself. Never heard of a Silver Fox. Boy Toy, yes, Silver Fox, that's new to me.

  3. the Tsaritsa says:

    Men love objectifying women. Nothing wrong with an older woman who knows what she wants, and like you said no one really hates on Hef's old ass, so why the big deal for Demi Moore?

  4. Thank, Q says:

    @ Tsaritsa – You women have it bad. It's not fair that it goes down like that, but men wrote the rules and society continues to live by it, I guess.

  5. MILF and cookies?! That's friggin' hilarious, Q.
    Being called a MILF or a cougar are pretty tame labels, I think. Hell, I've referred to myself as much worse. The only label I can't tolerate is being called “stupid.” That's honestly the only thing I am not, never have been, nor will I ever be. Everything else…probably fair game at some point or another.

  6. Thank, Q says:

    @ Reck – There are some people who would probably favor “stupid” over “MILF” or “cougar.” Hence the title “stupid.” LOL!

  7. According to Jewels says:

    I have never been labeled…hell I better not be a cougar at 31…and I have no kids so I am not a MILF. I don't know that I get too upset about labels like that. I don't think they are intended to be negative for the most part. I call handsome older men Silver Fox's and I have no problem labeling a man at the playground while I'm at the park with kids a DILF.

    The older woman with a younger man scenario makes sense. A lot of younger women can get crazy and not understand the casual sex phenomenon. Older women tend to have had their kids, made their $, and lived some life…they understand and accept pleasure where they get it. Younger men provide that for them. More power to them.

    As for older men and younger women. I have yet to see a young woman with an older man (substantially older) who made more money than the man. They are typically in it for the perks. The dinners, nice cars, nice houses, jewelry, status, and rarely (though not always) for love or the man himself.

    Since I have no interest in a Viagra fueled night with a man whose hip acts up I won't have to worry about the “gold digger” title…so I guess for now I'm title free.

  8. @Jewels: Woman with standards? Why, that makes you a bitch!

    Kidding… ❤

  9. Thank, Q says:

    LOL @ LiI!

    @ Jewels – He can always buy a new hip. LOL! Yeah, I think older women do have an advantage over older men (unless he's rich).

    So, since you're not a cougar or a MILF, what are you? A JILF? 🙂

  10. According to Jewels says:

    Brandon–ZING. haha. Got me there!

    Q-I like that title a whole lot more than the one that Brandon gave me! I'm going to start the BILF campaign for Bloggers I'd Like to Fuck! It's going to take off…I feel it *pun intended*.

  11. Thank, Q says:

    LOL @ Jewels – I can see the t-shirts on CafePress already! BILF shirts for the ladies! You may be on to a multi-million dollar idea! 🙂

  12. According to Jewels says:

    Q-It is about damn time that I had one. Let me copyright that shit right here and now…that shit is MINE people!!

  13. Thank, Q says:

    You comment is dated and time-stamped so you're good-to-go! Don't forget about me when you make it big!

  14. I want my BILF award! There HAS to be someone out there in the blogging world who wants a piece of me.Probably either Lady Estrogen, or maybe Simple Dude. Just guessing…

  15. Thank, Q says:

    @ LiI – I'm sure that award would be very popular. A lot of deserving people. Not you though. LOL!

  16. In my opinion, anyone who take serious offense to a label like MILF or Cougar cares way too much about what other people think and are too attached to labels. I've been referred to as a MILF and quite honestly, I took as a compliment. Most men who refer to a woman as a MILF aren't in close company… meaning they don't know her outside of a casual acquaintance. At that point all you have is physical appearance and superficial personality traits! What else is a dude going to say? "I'm attracted to her because she's my intellectual equal. You know, because she wears glasses." No, of course not. A man thinks a woman, with kids, is attractive; she's a MILF. Really…what else does he have to go on! As for a cougar, I don't think any woman who qualifies as a cougar really gives a rats ass what anyone thinks or calls her. She is strong enough to go after what she wants, in spite of society's double standards and judgement; I call her an independent, sexually fulfilled, badass! Hey, but that's just me! LOL!

  17. Thank, Q says:

    Very well said, DIP! That's a great point that someone referring to a woman as a MILF only knows the physical side of her and in a round about way, is appreciating that. It may be a bit crude, but it's meant as a compliment and shouldn't be taken the wrong way in most cases. Great comment!

  18. I like to call myself a “cougar in training” LOL … I have no problems with younger men but I have to admit I really don't take them seriously. They are fun to be around and bring you a different perspective, especially because they don't really have that much baggage. I say everyone should do what makes them happy and satisfied as long as no one gets hurt! Great post!

  19. Thank, Q says:

    Thanks, SDD! I guess everyone has a preference and even if youngsters aren't a preference, they're fun every once and a while, I guess. 🙂

  20. Neely says:

    I don't necessarily like the term “Cougar” but many older women who would associate themselves with that term wear it like a badge of honor!

  21. Thank, Q says:

    That's true! Thanks for commenting!

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