Cold Chicken Tenders

Posted: July 27, 2011 in elder, storytelling

Okay, so last Wednesday, my mom and my Aunt Bernice decide to roll 40 miles west of here to a town called Vicksburg. Some of you may know the name from the Civil War chapter of your history books, but others know it for the casinos.

My mom and aunt get to Ameristar Casino and decide to gamble the night away. Although I’m not a fan of gambling, my mom loves the casino. Sometimes I think she’s a $5 bet away from calling 1-(800) DONT-BET, but I guess that she’s earned the right to have fun. My mom is almost 69 years old and she’s retired more times than Brett Favre after 20+ years with GM. Someone who has worked as long and hard as she has deserves to live out her senior years however she wants.

So, after a night of gambling with my aunt, they decide to visit the buffet and grab a plate before heading back to their hotel room. My mom gets countless coupons that entitle her to “free” stays at the casino and she she cashes in on them now and then. She gets some chicken tenders and a roll and she and my aunt head upstairs for the evening.

The next morning, my mom asks my aunt to warm up the leftover chicken fingers in the microwave. Aunt Bernice takes them out of the refrigerator and proceeds to look for the microwave. She looks on the lower shelf of the cabinet and spies what she thinks she’s looking for. “Why is the microwave so low?,” she asks my mom.

My mom just shrugs her shoulders not really paying attention. My aunt bends over, places the chicken tenders inside of the black box and closes the door. “How long do you want them heated?,” she asked my mom.

“About a minute should be fine,” she replied.

Aunt Bernice pressed “1-0-0” to start the microwave and then walked over to finish doing her hair. After about a minute, she wondered why she didn’t hear that familiar “ding” that you get when the timer is expired. She noticed some letters flashing on the box, so she walked over, bent over and saw the word “Code” written on the device. She opened the box and felt the chicken tenders. “These things are still cold!,” she exclaimed. “I don’t think this thing works!”

Now my mom comes over to see what all of the fuss is about. She puts on her glasses and then complains that the microwave is too low on the bottom shelf. A few seconds later, her and my aunt are on the floor on their knees trying to find instructions for the microwave. She places the chicken tenders back into the box, closes the door and hits “1-0-0.”

The message on the front once again displays “Code” and my mom and aunt are completely confused. She presses “1-0-0” again and the display then reads “Secure.” That’s when my mom read a small label on the side of the box. That label said, “Safewell Hotel Safe.”

Those chicken tenders are still in there.

SN: By the time I post again, I should have reached the 100,000 mark for page hits! I want to thank everyone who visits the page and I most definitely appreciate followers and commenters!

If you can e-mail to me a screenshot of my page hits reading #100,000, then I will do something very nice for you. I’m unsure of what it will be right now, but it will be nice!

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Comments
  1. Jewels says:

    congrats on hitting that many page views. As for the chicken fingers locked in the safe…hilarious but I'd be so pissed if I was hungry. hehe.

  2. Ah that would have been a perfect Facebook Pic moment. Adorable, but I have a question, did they have a good laugh?

  3. Thank, Q says:

    @ Jewels – Yeah, I'm sure that it ruined her breakfast.@ Imnottouserfriendly – They've laughed about this for a week so far. My mom laughed hysterically while she told me the story. It took forever for her to get the entire story out.

  4. Woooow! lol! They'll probably be in there forever too…or at least until someone figures out that she set the code to 1-0-0, lol!

  5. That last comment was from me, Toni Diane, lol. Not sure what happened with the ID part…

  6. theTsaritsa says:

    LOL, I knew it was the safe! That's going to be a fun surprise for someone!

  7. Thank, Q says:

    @ Toni Diane – I hope that the casino has some sort of reset code to get into that safe. Good thing it wasn't scrambled eggs that were locked in there.@ Tsaritsa – Someone will be surprised with an unexpectedly bit of room service if they can get it open. 🙂

  8. Erin says:

    100,097 here! Holy cow!That's hilarious about your mom and aunt! In our family, we call that a "Senior Moment" 😀

  9. Adsila says:

    I almost spit out my orange juice reading this. Your Mom and Aunt are laugh riots! I would love to see the look on whoever opens the safe and sees cold chicken nuggets inside.

  10. 100,217… damn dude. I just barely hit 50k. You're rollin…

  11. Thank, Q says:

    @ Erin – Most definitely the perfect phrase for this story. They can't seem to stop laughing about it though. Every time I speak to my mom, she cracks a joke about it.@ Welcome, Adsila! I'm not sure if I've seen you around these parts before 🙂 You're right! Whoever opens that safe will be shocked and will wonder why someone decided to secure food. Thanks for chiming in! I've linked your site. http://above-the-norm.blogspot.com/

  12. Thank, Q says:

    @ LiI – But you have like eleventy billion followers, so you'll reach 100k in like a month or two. It took me a year and you've only been around since January.

  13. LilPixi says:

    Bwaahahaha! Great story!! Congrats on the hits too! =)

  14. Thank, Q says:

    Hey, CG!Thanks, Pixi!

  15. Squatlo says:

    I hope they didn't nuke their rings and valuables…Funny post, Q~!

  16. Thank, Q says:

    LOL @ Squato! Right! It's a good thing they did't think the microwave was the safe!

  17. This was just TOO funny!!

  18. Thank, Q says:

    Thanks, CO! By the way, creative name!

  19. Don't you just live for opportunities that relatives give us to tell stories?! I swear, I could go on and on about "relative stories." That is friggin' hilarious! And look at YOU…I'm reading this post now and you're at 101K+ page hits! I have a smidgen over 13k page hits…but that's okay, I can't get over the fact that anyone reads my blog!

  20. Thank, Q says:

    @ Reck – You're a discovery waiting to happen, so don't sweat it. As for me, I have no idea how I got this many hits. In all honesty, it doesn't necessarily translate into feedback, but I guess I should be satisfied with just the fact that I'm corrupting people with my way of thinking. 🙂

  21. BeaderBubbe says:

    Love it….sounds like something I would do….but then again at our age…who cares…

  22. Thank, Q says:

    @ BeaderBubbe – It's a funny story for sure and my mom tells it often. I have seen modern technology getting the best of a lot of people, younger or older, so age really isn't a factor. 🙂

  23. Danielle says:

    Your mom–protector of processed poultry products!

  24. Thank, Q says:

    @ Danielle – A badge of honor she will wear proudly! Thanks for commenting! 🙂

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