>Nothing Fabulous About The Ghetto

Posted: April 24, 2011 in ghetto, guide to men, mature


Ghetto fabulous: The combination of bad taste,an urban aesthetic and desire to wear one’s wealth. Basically, high priced but tacky clothing and accessories.

I got that from UrbanDictionary.com for those who need some pointers.

Being GF has been a way of life for some since way before I was born. The only difference between now and then is that we have a name for it. Back then, you just “lacked priorities.” Now, you’re “ghetto fab.”

The crazy thing about it is that some a lot of people embrace it. They feel as if it’s some sort of honor or something. You’ll see them riding in a nice Escalade sitting on 26″ rims blasting the newest jams on their stereo. They’re wearing the newest brand name clothes and the brightest jewelry. To everyone who sees them (and don’t know better), they are the kings of their block.

I wear two watches so I can show up twice as late.

To the people with common sense, they see the “wizard behind the curtain.” (for those who don’t understand that reference: what in the world did you watch as a child?) People with common sense knows that a man with all of those ghetto fabulous things probably stays with his parents because he can’t afford his own place. If he is fortunate enough to have his own spot, then the lights are off because instead of paying the bill, he “made it rain” $500 on some strippers at the shake joint to entertain his boys.

GF Men are the equivalent of a peacock. They flash the bright, flashy colors because it’s the only way to get a female’s attention. They can’t do it intellectually. They can’t do it emotionally. They have to distract their prey before conquering it.

Guess what? It’s worked for decades and it will continue to work since there are still a large total of women who are mesmerized by shiny things.  Women who will bypass the gainfully employed man in a ’05 Honda Accord for the “odd job” having man who hasn’t filed a tax return in six years, but has a 2011 Cadillac with a see-through aquarium trunk full of goldfish.

Eventually, after having a baby or two with the GF guy(s), they learn that they were fooled into thinking that they had something special in a guy who calls himself a “hustler,” but doesn’t have the work ethic of the word’s literal meaning.

Only a GF man would endorse a product for free due to lacking the intelligence to creatively make money.

If there are any ladies out there who need some guidance on finding a good guy, just remember this: Real men entertain women. Ghetto fabulous men entertain each other.

So, when you approach a man, instead of looking at his earring that may be 24k, ask about his 401k. If he’s over 25 and doesn’t have one, do a 180 and run like Lindsay Lohan being chased by rehab security.

If you have a ghetto fabulous experience to share, please do so in the comments below…

  1. >Yeah, Q…at the risk of outing myself as a retarded-ass fool, I will share a brief GF story. Met a guy who was as clean cut and cute and funny as they came – dressed really nice, sported a rolex, had some nice bling (tastefully done, nothing too over the top) AND he had a job (he was a barber – nothin' wrong with a workin' class man earning an honest living, right?). Yeah right…LONG story short: homie had NO car, was livin' with "Nanny and Pops" and was on PAROLE for some serious drug charges (he beat federal charges and then got popped by the State instead). He used to be a serious drug dealer (right down there in your neck of the woods – Jackson). Uh…THAT was why he had the rolex and the bling and the fancy clothes – leftover from his pimpin' days (bc he had someone "hold" his stuff while he was locked up so that it didn't get confiscated by the authorities). Ghetto fabulous? No thank you. I will take subdivision fabulous any day of the week. Not so much bling and mostly four door family sedans…but WAYYYYYYYY less drama. I am still to this day terrified that some "authorities" will come knocking on my door asking me questions about him…

  2. Thank, Q says:

    >"Subdivision fabulous?" LOL! Nice! He was from Jackson? Great. All we need is more of a bad rep. Yeah, some of those barbers and owners of detail shops are just trying to create a front for their real business. Well, I'm glad you didn't end up face down on your living room floor (in a bad way) with a cop's knee in the back of your neck. And how can someone sport a Rolex and bling, but be walking and staying with mom and pops? That's crazy! I bet he carried himself like he was a king.

  3. biboa says:

    >love your blog! keep up the quality posts!utubed.blogspot.com

  4. Thank, Q says:

    >Thanks a lot, Biboa! I appreciate you joining the mix!

  5. Sonia says:

    >LMAO! That was hella funny. I remember seeing that when I was growing up, but it wasn't like that bad. They weren't even that ghetto either. I chuckle every time I see some guy in a Cadillac, with 20's, TV's and anything else stupid they decide to sink in their vehicle, when you know DAM WELL THEY STILL LIVE AT HOME WITH THEIR MOMMA! What's so obvious is that they have to make sure EVERYONE SEE'S them too. I am like come on, no need to be that blatant.Men like that I avoid like the plague because when they do sum up the courage to open their mouth, it's usually their homie coming up for them to say their friend wants to, "GET AT YOU". Sure, the car got my attention, but your lack of confidence and balls turned me off. Another tale is when you see they put their life savings into their vehicle (what you gonna live in it too?) and don't even own a HOUSE! Deal breaker!

  6. Thank, Q says:

    >LOL @ Sonia! The chandeliers in the cars was the end-all, be-all to me. Epic fail on that. Yeah, these guys, like I said, are like peacocks. They want to blind you with the bling so that you can't see what they're really about.

  7. >You are right nothing fab about being broke.

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